Daily Life

Mother guilt is a really powerful thing. So powerful that even though logically I knew it wasn’t bad to want a “day off” from the kids, even though logically I knew that I had “earned” it, I still felt guilty for counting down the days to it wanting it. Why is it that my brain tells me its perfectly normal and OK to need a break, yet my heart tells me I’m a bad mother for wanting to spend even the smallest time apart from the girls??? Am I the only one who experiences this conundrum?

In any event, I did have my day off yesterday, since Rocky had the girls for the whole day. 9 hours of time to do whatever I wanted stretched before me. I was torn as to how to spend my time! There’s so many ways I’d have liked to spend the day; so many things that I could do so much easier with kids in tow - where to start? And how much can I cram into 9 hours, yet still feel relaxed and refreshed at the end of it??

So, I tried to find a balance of “to do” things and “me time” and this is how I spent my day:

• Started the day with a 1 hour aromatherapy massage (using up the last of a gift voucher to a Day Spa from my brothers and sisters-in-law for my birthday). Bliss!!! I wanted to stay there all day and just doze amongst the scented candles, essential oils and therapeutic hands…
• Headed into town to wander the shops. Going into the city with 1 or 2 kids along for the ride would be anything but relaxing, so I very rarely go into town.
• First stop: the walk-in nail salon that will Buff, Shape and Polish your fingernails for $12 with no appointment. I’m not usually a get-your-nails-painted kind of girl, but I felt like indulging myself. Again, pretty relaxing having someone else pamper me for 20 minutes!
• Next stop: Myer to buy a bra. I don’t know about you, but buying a bra seems to take me ages! Definitely something that’s easier to do on your own. Given that the last 6 years have been punctuated by 2 pregnancies and almost 4 years of breastfeeding, my sizing is all over the place so I never know what to get! But now that Chiq is starting to drop the midday feed, I thought it was time to buy a non-maternity bra for a change - even one with underwire!! (I know, I am easily excited :))
• Last stop in town: Borders Bookshop (the reason I went to town and not to the suburban shopping centres). Now this was really blissful - a whole hour to wander and browse the huge array of books, flick through some interesting ones, even sit in a chair and read for a little while! I didn’t look at one kid’s book, or have to chase anyone up the escalator, or stop anyone from ripping the pages….what an indulgence! I was actually quite restrained, though, despite the temptation to walk out of there with an armful of books (I am usually a binge book-buyer; I can’t help myself) I only bought one book (Getting Things Done).
• Headed home to have a bit of a chill-out - have some lunch (didn’t have to share it with anyone!), watch a little TV, surf the net, read the paper.
• At 4:30 decided to go out and buy a DVD player (on my to do list for ages). Picked up my bag and keys and walked out the door. Strolled into the shop at 4:45 - plenty of time to browse, find the right deal and pay (unthinkable with kids in tow). (DVD players are so cheap these days! Pretty happy with $65)
• Came home to relax for an hour before the kids returned.
• The mother guilt did kick in throughout the day, though - in amongst all these things I also did 3 loads of washing, vacuumed and mopped the floors and prepared dinner.

All in all, it was a good day. I felt satisfied, relaxed and refreshed at the end of it. I only have Chiq at home today (Guerita slept over with Rocky last night and he’s taking her to the Royal Show today - better him than me!), so we’ll potter around and take things easy. Might have to start packing for our trip to Sydney, but not much else…

So, what would be on your list of things to do if you had a child free day? How would you spend it?

I know, I’m joining the ever-increasing ranks of people who’ve posted about their telco and the terrible phone/internet service they’ve received.

Has anyone ever written a complimentary post about a telco?

I think not.

You know, I never once had a problem with my broadband connection in Mexico. It was reasonably priced, fast, reliable and was something I gave little thought to because it never caused me problems.

My current connection on the other hand…

I know I haven’t had all the problems that other have - I did manage to get connected before I moved into the house and it was relatively easy to set-up and get the wireless network running, but what is with these damn limits??? I signed up for a plan thinking the limit would be sufficient only to find after 3 weeks I had been “shaped” down to dial-up speed. I know, I know some of you only get dial-up (which is incomprehensible to me) so I should be happy with 3 weeks of fast speeds, but my gripe is actually with what happened next.

Since I still had a week to go before the limits reset and since I didn’t feel I’d had a higher than normal usage in those 3 weeks I decided to upgrade to the next plan - moving from 12GB to 25GB is only an extra $10 a month, which sounded pretty reasonable to me. Silly me didn’t read the fine print which said that your extra usage allowance would be allocated on a pro-rata basis - so instead of getting the extra 13GB for the month I got about 4GB!

No prizes for how long that lasted…

I had forgotten how incredibly frustrating dial-up speeds are - I would have loved to look at all your photos in the last week or upload my latest photography homework, but it’s just too damn slow!

OK, I’ve got that off my chest now. Rant over. My limit resets tomorrow so I should be able to upload photos and post as normal after that!

Ever since I moved into my house I’ve had that old Sesame Street song in my head - do you know the one?

Oh, who are the people in your neighbourhood?
In your neighbourhood?
In your neighbourhood?
Say, who are the people in your neighbourhood?
The people that you meet each day

This might refresh your memory…

I know, it’s a bit sad that I have Sesame Street songs in my head, but this one just popped in there because of all the people I have met in the last 2 weeks. It’s actually blown me away how friendly my new ‘hood is and how many neighbours I have met already. It’s not like anywhere I have lived before.

Maybe some of you experience this where you live. I suspect more so if you’re in a smaller/country town but if you’re living in the city, I think it’s a pretty rare thing these days. In the past I’ve only ever really been on "smiling terms" with my neighbours and never really got to know them, but here, I’ve met the neighbours on both sides and had lengthy conversations with them, met several other people further down the street and even been invited to the boy next door’s birthday party last weekend!

I have a few theories about why this area is so welcoming. Apart from the obvious ice-breaker of having young children, I suspect that the sense of community is what attracted a lot of people to the suburb. It’s also a fairly small suburb with several ovals, playgrounds, shops/cafe strip and local school within walking distance of most people, which means there’s always lots of people out on the street. I also think that the lack of garages with automatic doors connected to houses (which allow you to drive in, close the door behind you and disappear into the house) means there’s more opportunities to meet people around you. The design of the predominately old houses have led to lots of carport at the front of the house so everyone is always bumping into/waving hello/stopping for a chat with the people next door when you come and go.

So, whether my theories are correct or not, there’s no doubt that this is a lovely place to live and certainly an environment I really appreciate right now. Aside from loving the outdoor lifestyle and convenience of everything, it’s really nice to be surrounded by such friendly and supportive people. I’ve made friends with a few of the Mums from Guerita’s class and opened up about what’s been happening in my life lately (something I’ve been quite reticent about) and been so encouraged by their friendship and support. Socialising with anyone other than family and very close friends has been really difficult for me since I got back (in other words, I haven’t really caught up with anyone but the closest friends yet) so feeling comfortable enough to talk about everything with new friends was a pretty big step.

I wish I had some photos to give you a flavour of my new area - I’ll have to go on a scout around soon. I am conscious of giving away the actual location though, so I’ll have to make sure there’s nothing identifying in the shots. (I’m not worried about letting you guys, my friends, know where I live, you understand. It’s just I don’t want to go advertising my location to the lurkers I don’t know!!)

Phew! Finally, we are moved into our place and even though there are still boxes and stuff everywhere, we are starting to get settled and organised in our new home.

I have been heard to say quite a few times over the last week that I am never moving again. I am going to stay in this house till I die! We have moved so much in the last 8 years - the longest stint we had anywhere was the last 2 years in Mexico, and even then we moved house in that time - so I am thoroughly sick of it. I guess I have become more efficient and organised with my moves having done it so often, but it really never gets to a stage where it is enjoyable. I have been opening boxes that have been in storage for 2 years and wondering why I ever thought I would still need all those things. Today I threw 5 garbage bags of clothes in the charity bin - full of old work clothes from 10 years ago that I am definitely not going to wear again - can’t see myself in power suits and short skirts these days. This house is smaller than the last house we were in (in Mexico and Australia) and has much less storage so it’s been a challenge finding spots for everything. It’s a good exercise, though, since it’s forcing me to re-evaluate all the clutter I have accumulated.

I do have the internet connected at home now, but still have a heap of work to do getting the house organised, so I might be a bit scarce around the web for a while more. I have to make the most of child free times (when I might otherwise have blogged) - I get a lot more done when Chiq is asleep and not following me round pulling things out of cupboards faster than I can put them away!

This is what I really missed, being away from Perth….

…being able to enjoy the outdoors again with green grass to run on and pleasant temperatures to enjoy. It seems like it’s rained just about every day since we’ve been back but this weekend was bright and clear and not too cold. Perfect weather for running around outdoors and checking out our new “local”. Playground, that is, not the pub. That’s life with 2 young kids.

And I am still loving my new zoom lens!

I’m a bit behind on my Through the Lens photography assignments, but I do aim to catch up soon! I just have to find time to set up the White Balance experiment from Assignment 2 and then I’ll share my latest learnings with you…